Go Back   New Orleans Saints Forums - blackandgold.com > Main > Everything Else

Joke of the Day

this is a discussion within the Everything Else Community Forum; Re: Joke of the Day...

Like Tree1521Likes

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-27-2013, 07:39 PM   #671
10000 POST CLUB
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Shreveport,Louisiana
Posts: 15,996
Re: Joke of the Day

Re: Joke of the Day
WhoDat!656 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-28-2013, 07:51 AM   #672
10000 POST CLUB
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Shreveport,Louisiana
Posts: 15,996
Re: Joke of the Day

A few days ago, my teacher asked... what our favorite animal was?

I said, "Fried chicken."

She told me, I wasn't funny. My parents told me to always tell the truth and I did. Fried chicken IS my favorite animal. She couldn't have been right, because everyone laughed.

Anyways, my teacher sent me to the principal's office. I told him what happened and he laughed, too. Then, he told me not to do it, again.


Then, I told my dad what happened. He said my teacher was probably a member of PETA and how they love animals very much. Well, I do, too. Especially chicken, pork and beef.

The next day, in class, my teacher asked what out favorite live animal was?

I told her it was chicken. She asked me why? So, I told her, it's because you could make them into fried chicken.

Again, she sent me to the principal's office. He laughed and told me not to do it, again.
I don't understand any of this. My parents taught me to be honest. But, my teacher doesn't like it when I am.

Today, my teacher asked us to tell her what famous person we admired most?

I told her, "Colonel Sanders!"

Well, guess where I am now...






The next day, in class, my teacher asked what out favorite live animal was?



I told her it was chicken. She asked me why? So, I told her, it's because you could make them into fried chicken.



Again, she sent me to the principal's office. He laughed and told me not to do it, again.



I don't understand any of this. My parents taught me to be honest. But, my teacher doesn't like it when I am.



Today, my teacher asked us to tell her what famous person we admired most?



I told her, "Colonel Sanders!"



Well, guess where I am now...

"A Veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America" for an amount of "up to and including my life."
WhoDat!656 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-28-2013, 08:55 AM   #673
12,000 BS Posts
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Metairie, LA
Posts: 13,457
Blog Entries: 5
Re: Joke of the Day

Originally Posted by WhoDat!656 View Post
Re: Joke of the Day
Reminds me of the camping joke....
foreverfan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-30-2013, 12:59 AM   #674
Resident Swede
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Märsta, Sweden
Posts: 7,981
Re: Joke of the Day

A woman went down to the Welfare Office to get aid.. The office worker asked her, "How many children do you have?"

"Ten," she replied.

"What are their names?" he asked.

"David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David and David," she answered.

"They're all named David?" he asked "What if you want them to come in from playing outside?"

"Oh, that's easy," she said. "I just call 'David,' and they all come running in."

"And, if you want them to come to the table for dinner?"

"I just say, 'David, come eat your dinner'," she answered.

"But what if you just want ONE of them to do something?" he asked.

"Oh, that's easy," she said. "I just use their last name!"

W.T. Sherman is my favorite General. After all he did order Atlanta to be burned to the ground.
Crusader is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-30-2013, 01:04 AM   #675
Resident Swede
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Märsta, Sweden
Posts: 7,981
Re: Joke of the Day

A woman in a supermarket is following a grandfather and his badly-behaved 3-year-old grandson. It's obvious to her that he has his hands full with the child screaming for candy in the candy aisle, cookies in the cookie aisle and for fruit, cereal and soda in the other aisles.
Meanwhile, Grandpa is working his way around, saying in a controlled voice, "Easy, Tommy,we won't be long . . . easy, boy."
Another outburst and she hears the grandpa calmly say: "It's okay, Tommy, just a couple more minutes and we'll be out of here. Hang in there, boy."
At the checkout, the little terror is throwing items out of the cart and Grandpa says again in a controlled voice, "Tommy, Tommy relax buddy, don't get upset. We'll be home in five minutes, stay cool, Tommy boy.
Very impressed, the woman goes outside where the grandfather is loading his groceries and the boy into the car. She says to the elderly man, "It's none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don't know how you did it. That whole time you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying 'things would be okay...Tommy is very lucky to have you as his grandpa."
"Thanks," said the grandpa, "but I'm Tommy,This wee ****'s name is Billy.

W.T. Sherman is my favorite General. After all he did order Atlanta to be burned to the ground.
Crusader is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-30-2013, 01:08 AM   #676
Resident Swede
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Märsta, Sweden
Posts: 7,981
Re: Joke of the Day

Employee : Sir, you called me?
Boss : Yeah,go to the rest room and masturbate.
Employee : (After few mins) ,done sir
Boss : Do it again.
Employee : Done again, sir.
Boss : Do it once more
Employee : Now I don't have
stamina for it, sir.
Boss : Very good,here are my car
keys, drop my daughter at home.
Crusader is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-30-2013, 12:19 PM   #677
10000 POST CLUB
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Shreveport,Louisiana
Posts: 15,996
Re: Joke of the Day

The mother-in-law arrives home from the shops to find her son-in-law boiling angry and hurriedly packing his suitcase.

“What happened?” she asks anxiously.

“What happened!! I’ll tell you what happened. I sent an email to my wife telling her I was coming home today from my fishing trip. I get home... and guess what I found ? Yes, your daughter, my Jean, with a naked guy in our bed! This is unforgiveable, the end of our marriage. I’m done. I’m leaving forever!”

“Calm down, calm down!” says his mother-in-law. “There is something very odd going on here. Jean would never do such a thing! There must be a simple explanation. I’ll go speak to her immediately and find out what happened.”

Moments later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile.

“I told you there must be a simple explanation .....she didn’t receive your E-mail!”

"A Veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America" for an amount of "up to and including my life."
WhoDat!656 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-30-2013, 01:11 PM   #678
10000 POST CLUB
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Cypress Tx.
Posts: 18,977
Re: Joke of the Day

Click image for larger version

Name:	ImageUploadedByTapatalk1372615170.967357.jpg
Views:	0
Size:	41.3 KB
ID:	7260
TheOak is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-03-2013, 11:42 AM   #679
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mandeville, LA
Posts: 36,861
Blog Entries: 29
Re: Joke of the Day

A man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner. Both he and his wife decide that they won't tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess.

The kids were eager to know what the meat was on their plates, so they begged their dad for the clue. Well, he said, 'It's what mummy calls me sometimes'.

The little girl screams to her brother "DON'T EAT IT TOMMY, IT'S AN /\$$#0LE!!!"
WhoDat!656 likes this.
SmashMouth is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-07-2013, 11:36 AM   #680
12,000 BS Posts
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Metairie, LA
Posts: 13,457
Blog Entries: 5
Re: Joke of the Day

foreverfan is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules

LinkBacks (?)
LinkBack to this Thread: https://blackandgold.com/ee/37280-joke-day.html
Posted By For Type Date Hits
Joke of the Day - Page 9 : Jessica Elway Photos, Wallpapers, Galleries - This thread Refback 03-21-2012 03:53 PM 1


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:47 AM.


Copyright 1997 - 2020 - BlackandGold.com
no new posts