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WhoDat!656 09-28-2013 10:02 AM

Make the woman happy!
 
Do something she likes, and you get points.
Do something she dislikes, and points are subtracted.
You donít get any points for doing something she expects.
Sorry, thatís the way the game is played.
Here is a non-exhaustive guide to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES
You make the bed. (+1)
You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillows. (-10)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets. (-3)
You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) in the rain (+8)
But return with Jack Daniels. (-5)

PROTECTIVE DUTIES
You check out a suspicious noise at night. (+1)
You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing. (0)
You check out a suspicious noise, and it is something. (+5)
You pummel it with an iron rod. (+10)
Itís her pet Schnauzer. (-20)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS
You stay by her side for the entire party. (+1)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with an old school friend.(-2)
Named Tina (-10)
Tina is a dancer. (-10)
Tina has breast implants. (-40)

HER BIRTHDAY
You take her out to dinner. (+2)
You take her out to dinner, and itís not a sports bar. (+3)
Okay, itís a sports bar. (-2)
And its all-you-can-eat night. (-3)
Itís a sports bar, itís all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favourite team. (-10)

A NIGHT OUT
You take her to a movie. (+1)
You take her to a movie she likes. (+5)
You take her to a movie you hate. (+6)
You take her to a movie you like. (-2)
Itís called ĎDeath Cop.í (-3)
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans. (-15)

YOUR PHYSIQUE
You develop a noticeable potbelly. (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it. (+10)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts. (-30)
You say, ďIt doesnít matter, you have one too.Ē (-80)

THE BIG QUESTION
She asks, ďDo I look fat?Ē (-5)
(Yes, you lose points no matter what)
You hesitate in responding. (-10)
You reply, ďWhere?Ē (-35)
You give any other response. (-20)

COMMUNICATION
When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression. (+2)
You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV. (+500)
She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep. (-4000)

MaggieMayTB 09-28-2013 10:44 AM

Re: Make the woman happy!
 
Yeah, a basic guide for standard application.

halloween 65 09-28-2013 11:29 AM

Re: Make the woman happy!
 
THERE IS NO WAY TO KEEP A CREATURE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX HAPPY!! JUST A MAN'S WAY OF THINKING!! MINE.

WhoDat!656 09-28-2013 12:00 PM

Re: Make the woman happy!
 
NSFW


QBREES9 10-06-2013 01:31 PM

Re: Make the woman happy!
 
Yes Dear !

dam1953 10-06-2013 03:57 PM

Re: Make the woman happy!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by QBREES9 (Post 535287)
Yes Dear !

This has worked for me since 1975.

QBREES9 10-06-2013 11:46 PM

Re: Make the woman happy!
 
Then I'm going to have to try it. LOL


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