New Orleans Saints Forums - blackandgold.com

New Orleans Saints Forums - blackandgold.com (https://blackandgold.com/community/)
-   Everything Else (https://blackandgold.com/ee/)
-   -   How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience. (https://blackandgold.com/ee/72018-how-best-pick-out-your-wife-46-years-experience.html)

foreverfan 04-18-2015 07:35 AM

How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Mods... Please move immediately this to Sticky.:givemebeer:


Crusader 04-18-2015 01:44 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
That was great!

foreverfan 04-18-2015 02:08 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Merchandise in Now Available! :D

foreverfan 04-18-2015 02:14 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 

Ashley 05-03-2015 08:31 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
That my friends was great

skymike 05-07-2015 06:24 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
I could instruct on this now, after a year separated / divorced.

Its been a very bumpy road. I've almost died a couple nights.
Sometimes there's nothing good. There is no guarantee of anything, but
always the possibility of heartbreak, death, loss, injury, or even humiliation.

Its been the most fun year of my life.

saintfan 05-07-2015 12:30 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by skymike (Post 654671)
I could instruct on this now, after a year separated / divorced.

Its been a very bumpy road. I've almost died a couple nights.
Sometimes there's nothing good. There is no guarantee of anything, but
always the possibility of heartbreak, death, loss, injury, or even humiliation.

Its been the most fun year of my life.

I feel you bro. And dealing with people who love conflict in a system (family court) that rewards conflict....yeah...

I'm two years out and it's still not over. But I've got 50 50 custody 40 grand later minus my house and motorcycle...the very thing I offered that nut on day one. I guess that makes me...the WINNER!

/sarcasm

foreverfan 05-07-2015 07:03 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
SkyMike is going for Liz Taylor's record. What is surprising is women still think he has money.

Elizabeth Taylor Marriages

1. Conrad "Nicky" Hilton: May 1950 - Feb. 1951
The first of her many marriages was at just 18 to the heir to the Hilton hotel empire. Conrad Hilton (the great-uncle of Paris Hilton)

2. Michael Wilding: February 1952 - January 1957
Lasting a full five years, marriage number two -- to a British actor -- was substantially more successful than Taylor's first. The marriage was also Wilding's second.

3. Michael Todd: February 1957 - March 1958
Taylor was already pregnant with Todd's daughter, Liza, when they married. The flamboyant producer had wooed Taylor with lavish gifts and grand gestures.

4. Eddie Fisher: May 1959 - March 1964
One of the world's most famous and successful singers in the 1950s -- selling millions of records and a host of his own TV show -- Fisher scandalously divorced his first wife, Debbie Reynolds, to marry Taylor.
Burton: The Tempestuous Love of Her Life

5. Richard Burton: March 1964 - June 1974
6. Richard Burton: Oct 1975 - Aug 1976

QBREES9 11-14-2015 06:28 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
That was great!!!!

skymike 05-10-2017 05:40 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
2 years later. Still funny.

RockyMountainSaint 09-06-2017 01:07 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
1 Attachment(s)
I am the recipient of the equivalent of the Wife Lottery.
I a. A good Dood.
I am also, a handsome Dood.
I am in no way worthy of this woman.
Except, I am a badass, loving, Masculine, Black and Gold.com sum*****!
I am worthy.

foreverfan 09-06-2017 06:34 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
1 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally Posted by RockyMountainSaint (Post 762666)
I am the recipient of the equivalent of the Wife Lottery.
I a. A good Dood.
I am also, a handsome Dood.
I am in no way worthy of this woman.
Except, I am a badass, loving, Masculine, Black and Gold.com sum*****!
I am worthy.

She looks like a total BlTCH. :p


This is my total BlTCH. :cool3: And believe me...:bart:
I deserve her. :bs: :cool:

dam1953 09-06-2017 10:20 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by foreverfan (Post 762669)
She looks like a total BlTCH. :p


This is my total BlTCH. :cool3: And believe me...:bart:
I deserve her. :bs: :cool:

Now, now. That was shot in 2003 when you were probably newly weds. Who know what she looks like today.

SmashMouth 09-06-2017 11:25 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by dam1953 (Post 762754)
Now, now. That was shot in 2003 when you were probably newly weds. Who know what she looks like today.

FF feeds her this ...


https://media2.giphy.com/media/OapNdFPJMxn0c/giphy.gif

skymike 09-07-2017 07:29 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by foreverfan (Post 762669)
She looks like a total BlTCH. :p


This is my total BlTCH. :cool3: And believe me...:bart:
I deserve her. :bs: :cool:

Holy ****, FF. I apologize for
my reaction to this, but, cut me some slack. It is morning, afterall.

So, is it another year? This is still funny. And, it looks like Ive been
roped in again. Swedish babe- 6 ft. tall with her shoes on. I dont
know what hit me.

foreverfan 09-07-2017 02:56 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
2 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally Posted by skymike (Post 762780)
Holy ****, FF. I apologize for
my reaction to this, but, cut me some slack. It is morning, afterall.

So, is it another year? This is still funny. And, it looks like Ive been
roped in again. Swedish babe- 6 ft. tall with her shoes on. I dont
know what hit me.

Yea... you've been rode hard and put up wet. Taken advantage like you were Mexican or something.
You love it. We know. LOL


Quote:

Originally Posted by dam1953 (Post 762754)
Now, now. That was shot in 2003 when you were probably newly weds. Who know what she looks like today.

Yea... I'm used to people hitting on her and derailing me about her... Butt.... she still cleans up :hump: really great!!! :bart:
I've been married to her since April of 1992... 25 years ago. Not sorry at all.
Ask SmashMouth. His wife loves fried chicken... WTF did he get that pic? (I didn't say that Pam...) :D

2 Recent pictures from The 2017 Endymion Extravaganza at the Superdome in Feburary.
At 49+ (LOL) she still cleans up great. :D



:cool:

dam1953 09-07-2017 04:05 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by foreverfan (Post 762833)
Yea... you've been rode hard and put up wet. Taken advantage like you were Mexican or something.
You love it. We know. LOL




Yea... I'm used to people railing me about her... Plus she still cleans up really good.
I've been married to her since April of 1992 25 years ago. Not sorry at all.
Ask SmashMouth. His wife loves fried chicken... (I didn't say that Pam...) :D

2 Recent pictures from The 2017 Endymion Extravaganza at the Superdome in Feburary.
At 49+ (LOL) she still cleans up great. :D



:cool:

Beautiful lady. She has a bit of a Terry Garr look to her. I love hearing about long happy marriages.

The wife and I have been married 43 years this summer. She loves sports (football, baseball, NCAA basketball.. not much on the NBA) and is a die hard Saints fan ... of course. When we were young and dating I used to take her hunting and fishing. She could out-shoot some of the guys I worked with on dove hunts. That, sir, it the ticket for a long and happy marriage...a wife who knows how to handle a weapon.

foreverfan 09-21-2017 12:59 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by dam1953 (Post 762840)
Beautiful lady. She has a bit of a Terry Garr look to her. I love hearing about long happy marriages.

Thank you. For years people said that because it was so true. Now everyone says she looks like Brooke Logan Forrester from the soap opera "The Bold and the Beautiful". If she lost a few pounds and had all the work this lady has had, she would look like her twin sister.

This is Brooke.... LOL

http://media.gettyimages.com/photos/...4272?s=612x612

dam1953 09-21-2017 02:29 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by foreverfan (Post 765600)
Thank you. For years people said that because it was so true. Now everyone says she looks like Brooke Logan Forrester from the soap opera "The Bold and the Beautiful". If she lost a few pounds and had all the work this lady has had, she would look like her twin sister.

This is Brooke.... LOL

http://media.gettyimages.com/photos/...4272?s=612x612

But if the wife sheds a few pounds and has all that work done her personality just might become as plastic as her body. She could turn into a total b*tch like most actresses. The next step would be to leave your sorry butt and chase some sugar daddy!!!

foreverfan 09-21-2017 07:07 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by dam1953 (Post 765612)
But if the wife sheds a few pounds and has all that work done her personality just might become as plastic as her body. She could turn into a total b*tch like most actresses. The next step would be to leave your sorry butt and chase some sugar daddy!!!

Won't happen. She doesn't have it in her.

dam1953 09-22-2017 10:14 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by foreverfan (Post 765644)
Won't happen. She doesn't have it in her.

I figured you'd go with "she has a sugar daddy...me."

foreverfan 09-22-2017 05:35 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by dam1953 (Post 765682)
I figured you'd go with "she has a sugar daddy...me."

But I taste nothing like sugar. :)

https://giant.gfycat.com/CautiousIll...eruddyduck.gif

jeanpierre 06-14-2018 08:05 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Not a pleasant experience, the greatest failure of my life; but to my surprise, I've discovered I'm even stronger (will) than I thought...

She now resents me more because I didn't let her continue to hold our child hostage over my family and I didn't fall apart without her...

Yes, there were tough days (holidays), but it makes you stronger and if you allow your will to carry you, gives you a healthier outlook on life...

Would have preferred to make it work - but it takes two; unfortunately our legal system rewards angry women seeking control and predatory lawyers...

And for what it's worth, my Ex saw the divorce attorney the morning after my Dad's funeral; used her sisters' playbook, cleaned all cash out without my knowledge...

Despite repairing boats, tractors, skid steers, mini-excavators for "friends" , many treat you like the plague...

None of the lawyer "friends" offered free help - though they enjoyed free labour and mostly free parts for years...

So I understand the f*ckery that goes along with a divorce, but I also know when I share with you that you can take stock and come out stronger...

11 Years A.D.

foreverfan 06-14-2018 08:51 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by jeanpierre (Post 804225)
Not a pleasant experience, the greatest failure of my life; but to my surprise, I've discovered I'm even stronger (will) than I thought...

She now resents me more because I didn't let her continue to hold our child hostage over my family and I didn't fall apart without her...

Yes, there were tough days (holidays), but it makes you stronger and if you allow your will to carry you, gives you a healthier outlook on life...

Would have preferred to make it work - but it takes two; unfortunately our legal system rewards angry women seeking control and predatory lawyers...

And for what it's worth, my Ex saw the divorce attorney the morning after my Dad's funeral; used her sisters' playbook, cleaned all cash out without my knowledge...

Despite repairing boats, tractors, skid steers, mini-excavators for "friends" , many treat you like the plague...

None of the lawyer "friends" offered free help - though they enjoyed free labour and mostly free parts for years...

So I understand the f*ckery that goes along with a divorce, but I also know when I share with you that you can take stock and come out stronger...

11 Years A.D.


I guess you've been road hard and put up wet and dried the fck out. :confused:

jeanpierre 06-14-2018 09:21 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by foreverfan (Post 804235)
I guess you've been road hard and put up wet and dried the fck out. :confused:

Actually, it some ways she did me a favor; I no longer work for low wages for former friends in town, especially lawyers...

When her and her two middle sisters wiped out the cash, couldn't afford retainer, couldn't get legal assistance, so I had a fool for a client...

Two lawyers who are still friends, live out-of-state, who advised, prepped me, were amazed how I came out, thought I should be a divorce attorney...

For the poorest of folks, taking $5K-$10K just to process a divorce when the outcome is really already likely set really should be criminal...

Yeah, I took some tough shots, but my self-esteem is greater than ever now...

foreverfan 06-14-2018 09:44 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by jeanpierre (Post 804239)
Actually, it some ways she did me a favor; I no longer work for low wages for former friends in town, especially lawyers...

When her and her two middle sisters wiped out the cash, couldn't afford retainer, couldn't get legal assistance, so I had a fool for a client...

Two lawyers who are still friends, live out-of-state, who advised, prepped me, were amazed how I came out, thought I should be a divorce attorney...

For the poorest of folks, taking $5K-$10K just to process a divorce when the outcome is really already likely set really should be criminal...

Yeah, I took some tough shots, but my self-esteem is greater than ever now...


Yea I dumped my first wife :twisted: and her brother was the attorney :( and it didn't cost me a dime. :D We didn't have any children so it was easier. :p Seems brother knew I was right about his sister (FckCnt) so he did the whole thing for free. Later we laughed about it. ;) She is on her 4th marriage. :rolleyes: Poor bastard. :rolleyes:

Seems YouTube saved you some money learning about this stuff online.

jeanpierre 07-09-2018 01:47 AM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by foreverfan (Post 804242)
Yea I dumped my first wife :twisted: and her brother was the attorney :( and it didn't cost me a dime. :D We didn't have any children so it was easier. :p Seems brother knew I was right about his sister (FckCnt) so he did the whole thing for free. Later we laughed about it. ;) She is on her 4th marriage. :rolleyes: Poor bastard. :rolleyes:

Seems YouTube saved you some money learning about this stuff online.

Wow, if there's ever a reunion, we gotta get together over some drinks to share stories - your's sounds wild...

Grew up with several friends, one, an attorney, Greg represented another friend of ours who lacked, well, resolve and backbone...

Greg eviscerated our buddy's feminista wife (for infidelity and we thought it was on him), but the drama was too much and our friend ceased proceedings...

Only for them to resume and finally divorced a year later, but without Greg involved to Greg's relief...

Greg swore he'd never represent one of his close friends again - then my turn came; Greg lives outta town and limited his help to prepping me...

Called Greg with how it shook out, he called BS on me; emailed him the docs and he nearly dislocated his jaw; he's offered to help me go to law school...

Sad thing - my ex, always too proud to admit she's wrong, has now had two friends betray her confidence, revealing she can't believe I let her go through with it...

Stubborn Pride can be a b*tch; but you can't fix stupid and sometimes you just gotta give people that rope...

foreverfan 05-14-2019 02:57 PM

Re: How to Best Pick Out Your Wife - 46 Years of Experience.
 
MUCH NEEDED PARTY INFORMATION

Jagermeister can taste like Root Beer Barrel Candies.

Approved by years of Mardi Gras parade testing.

If your Jagermeister doesn't taste like Root Beer Barrel Candies, you are doing it wrong.


First... REQUIRED: it has to be FREEZING COLD. Second... you need TEST TUBE SHOOTERS. The test tubes shooters help keep it on the middle of the tongue and off the rest of your mouth. Third... THIS IS KEY... make sure the shot touches the front of your tongue where the sweetness receptors are.

Finally... Don't do the entire shot at one time and try to keep the shot on only the middle of your tongue. Do the shot in 3 or 4 tastes. This makes it easier to keep it right in the middle of your tongue. If you do it this way, it will taste like a root beer barrel candy and is oddly pleasant. I have shown many people at Mardi Gras how to drink this correctly. All were convinced. If you don't do it this way, it will taste like medicine especially if it isn't cold enough.

Doing Five or Six shots will give you a great buzz the entire parade and you won't have to pee.

Trust me... it works. I always have a bottle of Jagermeister in my freezer. :cool:




https://www.barproducts.com/media/ca...m/img_9901.jpg

https://www.licoriceinternational.co...280_detail.jpg

https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/i...y8-rzIL9Hm-0PQ





NEVER MAKE THIS FACE AGAIN!
Keep away from SkyMike.

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-R5Q0lpQu2x...o%2BSmooth.jpg


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:17 AM.


Copyright 1997 - 2020 - BlackandGold.com