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-   -   2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie (http://blackandgold.com/nola/22517-2012-man-what-stupid-movie.html)

skymike 11-25-2009 07:57 PM

2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie
 
I like all kinds of movies, from war & violence, to girl flicks (admittedly) and
especially love scary stuff, if its actually scary, ---loved Quarantine! Cloverfield, I Am Legend, War of the Worlds-- cmon, those boogers were outstanding--- they ate people and crapped blood vines, how cool is that???? And, as someone who already knows where theyre going in the End, I love End of the World movies, no matter what the understood belief system is in place. I'll enjoy the secular version and eat up the action, like voyeurs in the Coliseum.

Modern movies, more often than not, are usually disappointments these days, targeted toward the stupid, as most people in Hollywood are idiots, and assume we are too. Nevertheless, I bit on 2012, because, it was date night for me and the wife.

So the rumblings began. I love rumblings. I love it when its a normal day in Los Angeles, people doing their thing, watching ignorant stuff on tv, like Good Morning America, and suddenly, "whoa, Ethyl, did you hear that?" Meanwhile smart-glasses dude in the lab sees the little graph thingy go "off the charts," squints, and has to go over the data one more time to make sure. Then, its time to call his friend who works in the White House. And then he drives by homeless religious nut with "The End is Near" sign, and somehow always has to talk to nutjob conspiracy dude (this time its Woody Harrelson--- his worst acting job ever) to find out the real story. All the while, the movie references ancient ____(fill in civilization) who predicted with amazing accuracy that a movie about the end of the world would completely suck in the year 2009. All good end of the world movies start like this, and Im completely cool with it. The rumbling part can be really good and scary if done right. I love this part.

But like when youre trying to have sex, while the kids are making noise in another room, something kept irritating the crap out of me. It was what's his name---the lead guy. (his sister is an actress too) The kids were annoying, the step dad was gay, the mom was fine, and just needed to take off her clothes to help the movie get better. Anyway lead guy probably gets his ass kicked by Billy Crystal, but somehow he becomes an action hero in this--- stuuuuuuuupid !!!! Every second, when they're not boring us with his love-life problems, and irritating kids, he's driving just inches past the building which almost falls on him, and it just gets STUUUUUPID. Just comical. After a while, special effects just wear me out, when I know any 15 year old with a computer can do them. Its not like the old days, when they had to actually get Charleton Heston to actually ask God to split the Red Sea.

I dont know if the science actually works-- Sun activitiy microwaves the Earths crusts, creating nematodes (hell, I cant remember the actual term)
that destablize the crust, as heat brings the magma up to places like Yellowstone, where a super-volcano lies, and basically, the ground just collapses everywhere, and then super-mega-tidal waves (I refuse to say Tsunami- I dont believe in the metric system) wash the world away.

I can deal with all this-- it cant be any goofier than America-caused global warming. all cool. Also the idea of "floating arks," rather than the usual space flying escape ship, was rather bizarre, and cool. I like that.

What I dont like, besides the endless stupid special effects, lead-guy's ridiculous heroics, (at least you believe Swarzeneggar can break Ninja's necks) dumbass kids who need slapping, their boring love-life, just general horrible acting/writing, oh yeah, and also their attempt to mimic the DaVinci Code and National Treasure all in one.--- all this was awful enough, but they would escape one hazard, and go into this high-fiving,
laughing, banter ---after they just witnessed a billion people die.

It would be like narrowly escaping the World Trade Center on 9-11, and then they do something akin to to Scooby Doo dancing with Velma while wearing the "Ghost Miner"s mask, and everybody laughs.

Stupid, bizarre, and completely unbelievable.

I dont care about your little girls pants wetting or your love life, lead dude. 95% of the world just died in a horriffic catastrophe, which for all we know could happen again next football season. STFU and turn on the tv, so we can watch some cable news footage of all the horror.

This movie completely sucked, and while I admit, yes, my wife was looking outstanding last night, and I was ready to get home---bowpapockachow.... at the last 15 minutes, I just wanted this movie to be over.

skymike 11-25-2009 08:10 PM

Re: 2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie
 
gosh I hope the Saints win the Super Bowl before the world ends.

Halo 11-25-2009 09:20 PM

Re: 2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie
 
I heard the movie was the WORST from a buddy of mine who lives in Austin.

He said it was laced with political agendas and they walked out. He also said the premise was horrible. Said people actually walked out of the theatre.

CantonLegend 11-25-2009 10:25 PM

Re: 2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie
 
when a movie sucks that bad....the best thing to do is start setting the mood early

i went to see monsters vs aliens with my girl and that movie was pretty garbage

but a trick my dad was always telling me about when i was younger kept creaping into the dirty part of my mind.....it involves popcorn....and a hole in the bottom of the bag......and you can figure the rest out

RaginCajun83 11-25-2009 10:46 PM

Re: 2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie
 
I had someone at work tell me to stay away from this movie if possible, I guess it must really suck. I went see Blind Side last Saturday night and I highly recommend it to everyone even if they don't like football

CantonLegend 11-25-2009 10:49 PM

Re: 2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by RaginCajun83 (Post 178942)
I had someone at work tell me to stay away from this movie if possible, I guess it must really suck. I went see Blind Side last Saturday night and I highly recommend it to everyone even if they don't like football

loved it.....its not a football movie tho....it just has football in it

if you read the book, dont expect the movie to be like it

one of the best movies of the year tho.....when you find out about the kid sitting on the stoop at the end.....it was very heartfelt

RaginCajun83 11-25-2009 10:57 PM

Re: 2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie
 
True, football is the subplot to the plot but it still makes for a good movie. The football is the reason why I went to see it just to see how it played into the story

arsaint 11-25-2009 10:58 PM

Re: 2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by skymike (Post 178921)
gosh I hope the Saints win the Super Bowl before the world ends.


WHEN they do win, I figure that the world WILL end...

Maybe 2012 is being optimistic???

foreverfan 11-26-2009 06:36 AM

Re: 2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie
 
When I go to a movie and it sucks, I heckel it to death. Usually the audience joins in.

During the "Mummy" we started with saying that we would liked the worlds chances more if Harrison Ford starred in movie.

Nemesis 11-26-2009 07:24 AM

Re: 2012---Man, What a Stupid Movie
 
I liked 2012 as much as Independence Day, since Im drawn to mayhem and chaos. 2012 was in your face and over the top like nothing Ive ever seen. Woody was downright annoying and hard to watch. that scene of the rookie pilot dodging falling buildings was a bit much but I liked the way the Russian pilot went out. also saw no reason for the President to stay behind.


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