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TheJudge 11-16-2004 08:41 PM

What if the Saints played the Eagles?
taken off

nice article...

First quarter: Joe Horn scores a touchdown early on a pass from Brooks. He dances around and then picks up a Saintsation and throws her into the stands in the end zone. He dunks the ball through the goal post and then picks it up and runs around the entire field holding the ball over his head and dancing.

Eagles get the ball. McNabb slices our defense to shreds. The big play comes when Terrell Owens makes a spectacular 42-yard catch and sprints into the end zone. He takes off his shoes, socks and chinstrap and throws them into the stands, doing a striptease. Then he line dances with the foam-rubber Eagle mascot in the end-zone.

Second quarter: Horn goes deep and catches a ball with a diving grab. He gets up, dances, does a back flip, a series of splits, and the "electric boogaloo." He runs over to the Eagles bench and spikes the ball defiantly. Then he takes off his shoe and lobs it into the press box. Runs over to coach Reid and starts tickling him. More dancing ensues.

Second quarter: Terrell Owens makes a 3-yard first down grab. He gets up, dances in place, runs over to the Saints helmet painted at midfield, lays down and does horizontal jumping jacks in the center. Dances. When we return from a TV timeout, he's still dancing.

Third Quarter: Horn drops a crucial pass from Brooks that would supply the winning touchdown, it hits him right on the numbers. Figuring what the heck, the game's on TV, he decides to dance anyway. Using a secret cable stashed in the Ceiling of the Dome before the game, he ascends into the rigging and climbs around the inner roof of the Dome, before bunji jumping down again.

Fourth quarter: Terrell Owens dances, goes to end zone wall, reaches up and buys hot dog, eats it while dancing, autographs remaining half of hot dog, hands it to fan, goes to opponents' sideline and dances in front of them, drinks their Gatorade, rides the other team's exercise bicycle, runs outside of stadium, gives football to bewildered homeless guy on the street corner under the I-10, smiles at camera, runs back into stadium, goes back to his own sideline, puts on fur coat and garish rap jewelry. While he's dancing he totally ignores thanking the O-linemen who made the block that made the throw from McNabb possible.

It's clutch time. The Saints are driving down the field, and Horn makes a grab. He gets up, dances, runs around the field with the ball, runs straight out the tunnel, out into Poydras Avenue, goes over into the shopping mall and buys some housewares at Macy's. Brings them back and gives them to TO. What a diss! Runs over to sideline, dances, grabs Benson's umbrella and breaks into the Benson Boogie as the Saints go 8-8 and lose to the Eagles as time expires. Says Horn in the postgame interview: "I just gotta be me."

The league assesses a record $256,000,000 in fines on both players.

saintswhodi 11-16-2004 09:01 PM

What if the Saints played the Eagles?
Now that was pretty funny. Yet, eerily enough, I could picture it all. I only wish it could happen.

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