WhoDat!656

A man went to church one day and afterward he stopped
to shake the preacher's hand.

He said, Preacher, I'll tell you, that was a damned fine sermon. Damned good!'


The preacher said, 'Thank you sir, but I'd rather you didn't use profanity..'


The man said, 'I was so damned impressed with that sermon I put five thousand dollars in the offering plate!

The preacher said, 'No ****?!'

homerj07

SO I went in for my yearly check up the other day...

Everything was going along well, no problems.



Then the doctor sticks his finger up my ass...






I have got to get a new dentist!!

WhoDat!656

A doctor was addressing a large audience in
Tampa.

"The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us
sitting here, years ago... Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by
the germs in our drinking water.

However, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have eaten, or will eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?"

After several seconds of quiet, a 75-year-old man in the front row
raised his hand, and softly said, 'Wedding Cake.'

"A Veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America" for an amount of "up to and including my life."