Life lesons

WhoDat!656 · 04-07-2012, 09:37 PM

NUMBER 10
Life is sexually transmitted

NUMBER 9
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

NUMBER 8
Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

NUMBER 7
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.

NUMBER 6
Some people are like a Slinky - not really good for anything, but you still
can’t help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

NUMBER 5
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospitals, dying
of nothing.

NUMBER 4
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
criticism.

NUMBER 3
Why does a slight tax increase cost you $800.00, and a substantial tax cut
saves you $30.00?

NUMBER 2
In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT
Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers—what you do today, might burn your
ass tomorrow.

As someone recently said to me . . .
“Don’t worry about old age—it doesn’t last that long”.

04-07-2012, 09:37 PM	#1
WhoDat!656 10000 POST CLUB Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Shreveport,Louisiana Posts: 16,085	Life lesons NUMBER 10 Life is sexually transmitted NUMBER 9 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. NUMBER 8 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich. NUMBER 7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks, months, maybe years. NUMBER 6 Some people are like a Slinky - not really good for anything, but you still can’t help but smile when you shove them down the stairs. NUMBER 5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospitals, dying of nothing. NUMBER 4 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. NUMBER 3 Why does a slight tax increase cost you $800.00, and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00? NUMBER 2 In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers—what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow. As someone recently said to me . . . “Don’t worry about old age—it doesn’t last that long”.
	"A Veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America" for an amount of "up to and including my life."