Do not watch Saints Football if you take nitrates, often prescribed for chest pain, as this may cause a sudden, unsafe drop in blood pressure.

Discuss your general health status with your doctor to ensure that you are healthy enough to engage in watching Saints Football. If you experience chest pain, nausea, or any other discomforts while watching Saints Football, seek immediate medical help.

In the rare event of a Saints Football Game lasting more than 4 hours, seek immediate medical help to avoid long-term injury.

If you are older than age 65, or have serious liver or kidney problems, your doctor may start you with Arena Football. If you are already a Falcons Fan, or if you have HIV, you are going to die painfully anyway so do what you want.

In rare instances, men watching Saints Football reported a sudden decrease or loss of vision. It is not possible to determine whether these events are related directly to Saints Football or to other factors - however many simply passed out after the Superbowl. If you experience sudden decrease or loss of vision, stop looking at bad porn on the internet, and call a doctor right away.

Sudden decrease or loss of hearing has been rarely reported in people watching Saints Football, usually in the Super Dome. It is not possible to determine whether these events are related directly to watching Saints Football in the Dome. If you experience sudden decrease or loss of hearing, relax and order another beer. You'll be just fine you jack wagon...

Watching Saints Football should not be confused with other Football teams that fail to cause erections. Watching Saints Football should not be done alone in Atlanta, Tampa, Carolina, or Dallas.

Watching Saints Football does not protect against sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV.

The most common side effects of Watching Saints Football are screaming, facial flushing, and intense joy. Less commonly, blurred vision, or sensitivity to the media may briefly occur.


Sounds pretty safe to me!