I swear my dream job was to write for Rolling Stone. Problems with that were/are (a) I don't right for crap and (b) even when I feel a tad Liberal I'm still way too over-the-top Conservative for such a magazine, even though I'm an excellent critic of music if I do say so myself.

So next I thought I might have made a heckuva Sports Writer. And it's articles like this one, so pointless it should never have been written in the first place, that make me think I might still have a shot.

"New Orleans Saints' defense won't sleep on Tom Brady, New England Patriots"

Well, no ****. There's a freaking revelation. If I were a Sports Writer, and if my editor told me to write this article, I'd have at least changed the title to, say, "Saints and Payton Would Be World's Biggest Fools To Sleep On (or with) Tom Brady".

See. I still give the editor the article he/she wants, but I come at it from the "no way they'd be that stupid" angle, AND I get a little side action with my "or with" comment.

Missed my calling I did, and sadly the education I needed went with it.