Crusader

A black man is driving his Mercedes when he gets pulled over by a cop. The cop asks him for his license and registration and begins to question him about his car. "Where'd you get the money to buy such a nice Benz?" The man replies, "I'm a specialty surgeon, I enlarge a**holes." Skeptical, the officer asks more about the procedure. The man explains, "First you work a finger in, then two, three, until you can get your whole hand in...then you do the other and slowly pull and work the rim until you can get a foot in for more leverage, then both feet and pull and stretch it until it's about 6 feet. The cop asks, "What the hell do you do with a 6 foot a**hole?"

The black man replies, "Give it a badge and a radar gun".

W.T. Sherman is my favorite General. After all he did order Atlanta to be burned to the ground.